I tend toward wanting to run the show—not sure if that's a character defect, a gift or a challenge. But as we say in the current vernacular, it is what it is.
In my defense, often when I'm in charge good things happen for me and those around me. While I don't necessarily think of myself first as a leader, I like the idea of being a scout and reporting back as to what lies ahead (of course, interpreted through my sometimes unclear vision).
But the gifts of yesterday were abundant, coming when I least expected them on the heels of two very difficult weeks. The gifts came in the forms of people who are willing to circle around me and want to be part of my tribe through good times and bad.
Charnelle came into my life almost two years ago; she is my oncologist's right-hand woman, the nurse who keeps him on track and who works directly with his patients. From the first day she sat down with me to explain what my chemo treatments would include and how treatment would go, I felt a kindred spirit. Over the ensuing years of treatments (and now remission!), we've become true friends sharing our stories, meals and even (like yesterday) shopping trips. (Charnelle, I promise: No more deletions!)
We laughed, told stories about our kids, sighed simultaneously when Nat King Cole singing "Unforgettable" started playing in the store, talked politics [a subject upon which we differ greatly] and religion [a topic we can agree on] and asked, Does this make my butt look fat? (That last part is a big fat lie thrown in for a bit of comic relief.) What a gift to spend an afternoon with her.
But the day was only just beginning when I left Charnelle and went to pick up Kitti (another kindred spirit). I vividly remember the day I met Kitti and her husband at a church function little more than a year ago; I felt that tug on my heart that whispered, these people are part of your tribe. Turns out Kitti and I lived parallel childhoods in so many ways it's eerie. Lived just miles apart but didn't meet until now.
Kitti and I went out to her mom's house for dinner (her hubby had other business to tend to). Sitting there with her mom, her uncle who is visiting from out of town, her two brothers and various nieces and nephews scurrying about, I felt like I was home. We ate meatloaf and compared growing-up stories, realizing how many more experiences and people we have in common in our life stories. Three hours passed in the blink of an eye! (Happy belly-button birthday today, my sister!)
I had no idea when I woke up yesterday morning what I was going to do with that one wild and precious day. And I'm comfortable these days waking up without a plan and simply asking, God, please show me your will for my life. When I least expected it, the gifts far outweighed the challenges and I realized (all over again) how truly blessed I am. Yesterday and its gifts are now tucked safely and happily away in my Shrine of Memories.
Peace and love on the path.
